Friendship Building

Friendship Building

Introduction
The following provides suggestions for building new friendships.

Friendships don't just happen. Although one person may start a friendship, both partners will need to contribute to the building process. You can initiate a friendship by moving toward a prospective friend and starting a conversation. You will probably have very few friends if you wait for them to come to you.

Remember that initial relationships with others are generally a little awkward. Allow yourself some time to feel comfortable with the beginning of a friendship--the initial awkwardness is natural and will lessen as you get to know each other.

Following are some tips to help you get started making new friends.

Involvement
Be where other people are. You can't make friends if you aren't in the situations where there are people. Involvement entails both COMMUNICATION and LISTENING. Share feelings, ideas, opinions and activities, and listen -- listening to both the speaker's words and feelings conveys your interest.

Send Friendly, Non-Shy Signals to Others
It helps both you and them loosen up. Try these suggestions from Dr. Arthur Wasamar, author of Making Contact, a system he calls SOFTEN. Soften breaks down this way.

Smile
It shows you're friendly and would enjoy the other person's company.

Open Your Posture
Uncross your arms and legs; you'll look more relaxed.

Forward
Lean toward the person, or move closer to show you're attentive to what he or she is saying.

Touch
A hand on another person's arm is a welcome gesture (make sure you don't touch too much, however.)

Eye Contact
This shows that you don't want to miss what's being said.

Nod
A nod communicates that you understand what's being said and you're interested in keeping the conversation going.